Ramadan note: togetherness

On daily basis, my family does not have a custom to have our meal together in the dining room at the same time, or perhaps we used to. Food are prepared and everyone is free to have his/her meal whenever he/she feels hungry. Also everyone comes home on different time or sometimes has his/her dinner out. But Ramadan is special. You know when you have to eat, before sunrise for suhoor and after sunset iftar. You won't start your work that early and will make sure to stop the work for iftar. So food are prepared and everyone is able to sit at the same table.

Since I live alone, I really appreciate the time I can enjoy my meals with a companion. It would be so different to have suhoor and iftar alone for the whole month, because it's something I always did together at home. It's not like I can't do it alone, but it'll be nice if I have it with someone else.

Alhamdulillah, in all three years I have lived in different places in Europe, I always know some muslims who can accompany me for suhoor and iftar. When I was in Italy, I lived in a dorm where the kitchen was shared for people who lived on that floor. And I had 2 muslim neighbors who would prepare their food for both meals every day so I had never eaten alone. Last year in Germany, I always had suhoor in my room with April, an Indonesian friend of mine. Here, I know a British Pakistani girl, Hafsa, who lives on 2 floors above me and she has agreed to do suhoor and Fajr prayer with me during Ramadan. Because Ramadan is about togetherness.

Some relatives in Indonesia were worried about how lonely I would be during Ramadan because people are not fasting here. Not a single day I have felt that. In Italy, I knew some other muslims. They were actually people I barely knew because we met just once or twice on our way to uni. But I knew they were muslims and so did they about me. That's all what is important, and they didn't mind inviting me to have iftar at their place. Or perhaps I have to tell about my story in Germany when my muslim neighbors (we lived in the same floor at my dorm), one gave me some dates and one gave me some soup he actually prepared for his iftar. They were 2 different people, and I never actually talked to one of them because I didn't know if he could speak English and my German was so bad. I was cooking in the kitchen and so was he. Then I went to my room to get something and when I came back to the kitchen there was already a plate full of dates from him. No conversation was needed, just because he was fasting and he knew I was fasting too. Because Ramadan is about togetherness.

The muslim communities in these 3 places I have lived are rather big, especially in Germany, and there are mosques where they provide free iftar. I went to the one in Trento once, and I had been to 3 different mosques in Saarbruecken. To be honest, last year April and I had the second half of our iftar in a Turkish mosque near our dorm, which was only 5 mins by bike. There were also 2 times on which the mosque at uni organized iftar and taraweeh prayer as well. Everyone was welcome, including non-muslims, but they had to register beforehand so the organizers knew how much food they had to prepare. That was really nice!  What I like about having iftar at the mosque is the chance to do jamaah (together) prayer as well. Because Ramadan is about togetherness. I haven't been to any mosque in Prague this Ramadan but I'm looking forward to it.

I always manage a good contact with Indonesian community in the places I live. That also gives an opportunity to feel Ramadan more like home. Not just because of the food (although that's the main reason) but also because of the atmosphere, the way you see Ramadan in the same perspective and the common situation you have, being far away from home, that make you feel grateful of having each other to celebrate the Holy month. Again, Ramadan is about togetherness.

A few days ago, when I had my suhoor with Hafsa, she told me how empty she felt last year to have her meals alone in her room during Ramadan. I was so touched when she said, "I am happy I don't have to do it alone this year. Thanks for existing."

All praise be to Allah.